I am looking for singers (male & female), preferably with Tamil knowledge, lyricists, drummers, keyboard players, flutists, guitarists for my album. If you are interested, please leave a comment or contact me via my profile page

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Bull'ish Proposal

A woman used craigslist, ny - to look for wall street husbands making more than $500k/year.

Apparently, she made her 'business' case stating that in NY $500K means nothing. In an interesting response, ".. "plain and simple a crappy business deal."

"Your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity ... in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't be getting any more beautiful!" the banker wrote.

"So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset," he said. "Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!"

"It doesn't make good business sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease,.."

So the seeker's economic interests were undercut by the provider's economic interest ! - c'est la vie :)

(courtesy: http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20071010/od_nm/newyork_husband_dc)

Friday, October 05, 2007

Mysterious Girl

Chapter 1 : Manning learns to walk.
Walking at a pace slightly faster than a slow-mo replay of babies learning to walk, was Manning on the treadmill. Where he hails from, his name is a little bit longer - Manikandan.

He was surprised at how most people that he has worked with over the years, seem to be remarking that Manning needs to hit the gym. He was told six-pack abs was the way to go. Poor thing, no one told him that six-pack did not mean 6 packs of trail-mix cereal bars.

The gym experience was not as exciting as he thought it would be. No one at the gym would talk to him, he would stare at everyone only to realize that all were busy with their headphones. And then it happened.

Chapter 2 : Harry met Sally.
Full moon on the treadmill, yes, he was convinced. It took a while for him to realize it was indeed a very beautiful looking desi female. With an air of no-nonsense, the smile of a mona-lisa, a cute dimple, a bright smile and to top it all, no headphones on.

All of this meant only one thing to him, he should try to strike a conversation within the next 6 months, and manage a smile in the next few weeks. He knew it took a lot conviction. Smiling was second nature to him, except that he could not when she was around.

He believed in baby-steps, ironically. He would give it some time, and the chemistry would set in, for laws of physical attraction to work. His mathematical abilities signalled a very high statistical probability of getting a smile in return. It did not matter he never managed to clear any of these subjects while schooling.

Days went by, with Manning slowly mustering the courage to steal some glances unbeknownst to his angel, but not before he was totally convinced that she would not jump out of the picture on his cellphone, to slap him.

Chapter 3 : Harry nears Sally.
That day, he was really assured, as calm as a storm, that he would go near her. The steps took a long time coming, yet after 15 minutes, he was still where he was. Damn it ! these treadmills he thought !

The next day, he made sure, he was not anywhere near a treadmill - and he was not that far away from her. She seemed unflustered at a desi male approach, only to realize this guy walked past her, without even stealing a look. Hmm ! that is surprising she thought. Little did she know how Manning was turned into a nervous wreck just crossing her, and he was sure, that the act of looking at her in the eye was light-years away !

Two weeks later, he was quite comfortable walking across her, stealing glances, smiling at her without any reciprocity, and even staring at her. She started feeling the creeps. She was boiling over on the inside, but never did her facade of a smile give way to her emotions. She was carefully watching his every move thinking of how to counter him.

Chapter 4 : Interesting Weekend
His weekend was a disaster. A friend from 5-6 years back, came over to drag him out a conference where 'e-Business' was the theme and a VP of one of the largent commercial bank was to talk on how to achieve market penetration. He had warned his friend about any Amway'sh pyramid schemes. But little did he know how valuable this conference was.

The audience were urged to stop working and start their own business. The business of adding people to a pyramid. The business of making money for your upline (person ahead of you in the pyramid), of making money out of gullible people, of making people buy products at a price higher than any other comparable products in the market, of convincing them that the reason for such higher prices is higher quality. They spoke at length about 'free enterprise days', to listen to which, you had to pay atleast five or six-20 dollar bills. They spoke about how to develop your business by talking to people about starting their own business. The speakers at the conference proclaimed, this would be the most unforgettable day in every attendee's life. It sure was.

Manning was drained, frustrated, irritated and was almost gonna bash up few Indian cricket players for their performance. But, her face, the very thought of her, calmed him down, while at most other times, it would stir the tummy within.

Chapter 5 : D-Day
On monday, he had realized this was his day. The day he'd waited for all this long. The day when he was to go strike a conversation with his angel. When he got to the gym he looked around for his angel. Not to be found. He told himself, good things had to wait. He was rehearsing his lines over and over again. He also carefully considered his exit plan. After all these weeks on the treadmill, his legs were good enough to run away should she decide to explode. He knew the layout, the distance it would take for him to be safe. The number of blocks he had to scurry. All of it seemed perfect. The most oppurtune moment it was.

And there she was. Walking right past him, casting a spell of fragrance, leaving him debilitated. The drop of sweat from his eyebrow woke him up. He walked up to her, more like a disco dancer shaking his leg, only that he was not one. And yes, now he was within her striking range.

Chapter 6 : Da-moment
This was the moment. Manning was right in front of her. Only the words in his mind separated her from him. However, some powerful glue, was preventing his vocal chords to move. He still managed, "Hi, can i talk to you about something ?"

She could sense Manning's approach. The eerie feeling of yet another desi male approaching her. What could be different ? They are all the same. She seemed to be signalling someone. Before Manning could realize what was going on, He-man was standing in front of him.

Chapter 7 : He-man
She had discussed with her weight-trainer couple of days ago, over her cup of frappucino with double whip, about some help she may need to ward off a potential troublemaker. The trainer was all for it. He could swat a fly in the time it takes for you to think about it. He could crush an ant, in the time you could spell it. The airmass displaced while he walks past causes couple of treadmills to lose their bearings. All she had to do was wink, and this real six-packer would be beside her in a moment. She knew this would work like a charm against Manning. He-man he was.

Manning realized the folly of his move, but only a little bit too late. The whole word seemed to come to a grinding halt. But not the treadmills in the gym. All his exit routes seemed non-existent. He had to do something. He had to, for the love of his life.

Chapter 8 : He-does-it
He did it. His lips moved. His vocal chord produced few words. And then there were none. She had disappeared. So was the he-man. So were the guys in the hearing range.

Back home, he was narrating this story to his friends. None of them could stand the suspense. What did you do ? Hope this is not potty humor ? Did you say something bad ? How could you make a weight-trainer disappear ? Why would he-man runaway they kept pestering him.

Manning's eyes twinkled. It had mischief written all over it. With a smug face, after what seemed to extend a brief pause to an eternity, he blurted it out.

Manning had said, "Do you know how McDonald's business model works ? Can i talk to you about Amway ?"

He thanked Amway for saving his life :)

The End.

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Guess the question ?

Guess the question, if this is the answer...

“I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uhmmm, some people out there in our nation don't have maps and uh, I believe that our, I, education like such as, uh, South Africa, and uh, the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and I believe that they should, uhhh, our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S., uh, should help South Africa, it should help the Iraq and the Asian countries so we will be able to build up our future, for us.”

if you did, you should be the proud owner of the title 'Miss Teen America'

if you did not, too bad, you will have to settle for good grades in English.

p.s : The question was 'Why do you think more than one fifth of americans are unable to locate their country on the map'

phew - beautiful indeed ! Watch the entire video here, courtesy Youtube.com

Friday, August 31, 2007

2000 uses and counting...

Now, come'on we are not talking about the popular toilet flush tablets :P

Did you know WD-40 (the common household mechanical lubricant) has 2000 and more uses ? Thanks to my colleague, you can read up all the uses here

The ones that i like the best are
  1. Remove lipstick from carpet - ROTFL
  2. Remove make up from carpet
  3. Remove adhesive from bird's wings

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Moral Policing - Part 2

If you have not read Moral Policing - Part 1 , please do so here.

Now comes the sequel.

This cop pulled his drunk wife twice and gave her a ticket. Wow, way to go people ! :) Yet again, I should say am impressed about the morality expressed, implying the subtle human'ness in everyone.

One wonders whether the routine in-fighting at home had anything to do with this ticket.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Budget Dental Clinic

Bizzaro, the comic strip, by Dan Piraro is funny on-and-off. But last friday it was ROTFL

Here is the link to the "Budget Dental Clinic" (Courtesy: washingtonpost.com)

p.s : Notice the small live "fire cracker" on the table, to the left of the doc ;)

Now, for the artist in you, can you think of a comic strip for "Budget Mental Clinic" ;) :P

Thursday, August 09, 2007

Numbers Don't Lie...

... goes a popular saying.

Numbers Don't Lie...so do WRONG numbers, i'd like to add :)

CrossLoop - help a remote pc user !

... from the previous post, CrossLoop is a product that lets two users connect over the internet tunneling through firewalls and let one user control another (ofcourse, with consent, and explicit action)

Will help many trying to help their parents, and less-tech-savvy friends in helping them out !

Here is the site

Microsoft, IBM, and Digital

Video interview by Scoble, the popular tech blogger, talking to Tom Rolander, who was the flying partner and good friend of Gary Kildall of Digital - the duo that let go of the oppurtunity to become Microsoft !

A Long video 1 hr , the whole build up until minute 30, is important to understand the events that unfolded later.

Interesting bits - how Gates did not want OS business to start with, when the first API was born etc...

Here is the video

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Paris Quoteworthy...

'"I used to act dumb. It was an act. I am 26 years old, and that act is no longer cute," Hilton told ABC News' Barbara Walters. (Watch what might be next for Hilton Video)'

Source : CNN.com

In the seemingly never ending saga about Paris, this triggers yet another question about what is better for her to do. To be cute or act like dumb ! ?

Update: OMG, this lady can act ! - I saw snippets of her interview with Larry King Live, and man this is not Paris !

Update 2: Rumor mills have it that Kamal is interested in pairing with this wonderful actress for a movie 'parisodu vilayadu' ... and another with actress sadha titled 'sada'avadaram - is it not exciting ?

Sunday, June 03, 2007

Extra mile towards golden Happiness...

is often not worth the cost is the point made in an excellent post by Dilbert'ian Scott Adams here. Makes much sense the more one comes to think of it !


Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Moral Policing

This is not about Shilpa Shetty, Richard Gere, Choco Jesus, Khusboo or PMK.

It is about some cop deciding to write himself a ticket, coz he violated the rules ! I should say am impressed about the morality expressed, implying the subtle human'ness in everyone.

Oh well, one wonders whether these tickets count towards the monthly-ticket-goal :D ?

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Spelling B

We have all been amazed one time or another, at, how all these young kids in the Spelling Bee competition - manage to spell all kinds of words, spoken and not, known or not, with the ease of spelling their name.

Now, it is time to be amazed by how people NOT spell, a famous name, correctly. Before you must know who it is - let me give you some clues.

According to people who looked her up, she is a brat, brut, brit, grit, prit, brot, birt, bitt, drit, brent, rit, sprit, bright, brine, britannia (well, i made the last one up ;))

Any guesses ? Scroll a li'l bit down...

Check google's spelling correction statistics for Britney Spears

Looking at the statistics, some of the interesting observations are - how no one got her last name 'spears' wrong !! and how some people thought she owns spears (britney's spears) and how people have so many typo's looking for britney - after all they are not focussed at what they type or are they ?

Monday, April 02, 2007

Time Management

Time is a factor of one's priorities.

Need more time to do things in your life ? look no further, but into your priorities !

I know most common reply would be, but how can it be ? i want to do so many things that i love to do - but dont find time - and my answer is, you may love to do them, but right now, you need to do the things that you are doing every 24 hours, or so you have chosen :)

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Magnetic Untouchability !

This is not a post about the much touted problem of untouchability. But it is about how to encourage untouchability - amongst cars ! - "Dont touch/rear-end me !!!!!!"

There are many silly ways one can think of preventing common rear-end accidents - most of them rely of James Bond'ish equipment - pepper spray, smelly gas, gabtun tamil, cellphone ringtone etc - all on push of a button, that would cause the driver behind you to slam the brakes.

But why not have a magnet ! - make it mandatory on front and rear-ends of cars - voila - "dont touch me" will be the language spoken by those magnets ;) - the problem that i can see immediately being, if the momentum is high enough to overcome the magnetic repulsion, it will cause a shear on the car and hence cause side collisions :| - so why not drive magnetic cars !! :)

before anyone attempts to patent it or make money out it - remember, i own the idea :D

Monday, February 12, 2007

Sleep and Save yourself !

If you are awake to read this, bad news, you may have heart problems.

If you are asleep, you can't read this, but hey that is the good news !

A new study has shown that napping has beneficial effects that could save your heart :)

p.s : The funniest bit in the article is "..It's likely that women reap similar benefits from napping, but not enough of them died during the study to be sure, said Dr. Dimitrios Trichopoulos"